Kellog Pastry Crisp Blueberry: $2.99/Box of 5/Kroger

My conversational French is pitiful, tres mal. On occasion, I’ll put on something in French on Netflix without the subtitles and can squeak by, but for the most part, my knowledge of the French language is at best, mediocre, unless I’m reading it. So imagine my surprise when a kindly fellow sitting nearby at a bar I was at recently overheard me blurt out a “Merde!” when I spilled my Sweetwater 420 Blue into my lap and he blorped off several responses to me in French. If my French skills were better, I would’ve tried to play it off like I’m some darling European drowning in la bierre and burritos in Braselton, but non, I had to sweetly hold up my hand in the universal signal for “hold up bro” and determine what he was saying, which was simply a concern for my spilled drink and nothing more.

I don’t conceal my dislike of all things blueberry, but at the very least, Sweetwater 420 Blue just smells like the fruit, but doesn’t taste like it. I can’t say the same for Kellogs Pastry Crisp Blueberry that smells like sugar air and tastes abundantly like the artificial blueberry approximation so much so that I couldn’t stomach it. I love the Kellogs two-pack crisps, and while not filling, two are an easy snack treat, but I would take any other flavor over this one. 1/5

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Categories: Miscellaneous

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