Quaker Breakfast Flat Banana Nut: $3.49/Box of 5/Publix

quakerbreakfastflat_banananut (3)On a walk this morning, I was treated with a most humorous experience in the form of a brzzzzting approaching motorcycle behind me on the picturesque tree-lined cul-de-sac of a neighboring neighborhood. I hopped the red wagon back to the curb only to see a pleasantly-plump, black-leather clad man whip his motorcycle into a driveway framed in
a riotous explosion of colorful flowers. His face was apoof with a white wooly beard, and upon turning off his bike, a teeny floofy white dog bounds from his lap to relieve itself on the daylillies. This dog was like a cotton ball, it might have been an extension of his beard, or maybe was riding shotgun, nestled in its owner’s facial hair.

If I had a beard, I wouldn’t let animals roam around in it (although AUGH, could a bearded man get lice?), but I WOULD “accidentally” let little crumbs fall into the hidden crevices for a little snack later on. I think there was a man in a Roald Dahl short story who would intentionally do just that, and there was something else about his wife swapping out half of his spaghetti noodles w/ worms. Ohh Roald Dahl, I hope I can get Joanna to start reading The Witches without freaking out over the first chapter where the creepy coven members’ physical attributes are described. So back to the walk – if I’d been able to stick my tongue out and find a surprise snack crumb, it would’ve been the Quaker Breakfast Banana Nut bar that I’d eaten earlier in the morning. This was one of those flat crunchies, the kind that I’m only wild about when it’s been dipped in a cup of coffee to soften it up. But a coffee-dunk didn’t improve this flavor – banana in bars always seems to have an overly artificial aftertaste. It’s making me long for the sour cream banana nut bread that I used to make for Joanna’s daycare as thank-you gifts during teacher appreciation week. And on another walk I remember, which WAS teacher appreciation week, it was so charming to see elementary school boys holding bouquets of tulips and sunflowers, waiting on their school buses. Good thing that none of those boys had beards yet because they’d probably be smuggling Pop-tart crumbs, and I guess if they could fit a pet in their beards, it’d be a gerbil or a hermit crab. Wow, I’m glad that I have girls, no pets, and no motorcycles in the garage. 2/5
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