Belvita Pumpkin Spice: $2.38/Box of 5/Target

belvita_pumpkin-spice-3I just got the bar equivalent of a doorstep’s smashed pumpkin. My box of Belvitas was apparently tossed around en route and hurled on my doorstep this afternoon because upon opening the package (inside of which was nary a peanut, air bag, bubble wrap or craft paper shred to protect its contents), I discover my box of Belvitas is pulverized. I can gently nudge each wrapped breakfast biscuit crunchy morsel and hear a symphony of crumbly crunchy crumbs. Returning to Target’s website results in – go figure – product unavailable. Pumpkin Spice season is winding down (mid-October when, you know, Christmas stuff starts replacing Halloween items before Halloween has even passed), so I can’t even request a replacement. So, I’ll just open the least crinkly and noisy package and try to dip the largest of the pieces in my coffee because that’s how I roll.

My Halloween proverbs: May your trees be TP-free (unless you need to wipe your nose or your bum), may your mailbox be shaving cream free (unless your legs are a-stubble like mine), may trick-or-treating include at least one dauntingly sloped and long driveway (as long as the reward is full-sized candy bars or possibly a bar at its peak), and may your streets be free of creepy sexy versions of costumes (unless it’s a sexy corporate logo mascot, like sensual Texas Pete Cowboy, or erotic Aunt Jemima, or explicit Tony the Tiger.) And may your pumpkins remain unsmashed unless you plan on making a pumpkin pie (or like myself last week, a black bean pumpkin Hallobean Chili.) AND lastly may your Belvitas remain as intended – four crunchy surfboards, perfect for dipping in tea or coffee. 4/5


Categories: Miscellaneous

Leave a Reply