Bobo’s Oat Bars Apple Pie: $2.99/Higher Grounds

Bbobos_applepie2obo’s Oat Bars, I couldn’t stay away. Meat Mountain, I don’t think I’m ready to try to conquer you again. I’m at Higher Grounds, a week after my triumph over Andre the Giant, creepy and curious as to whether or not anybody else is going to arrive this afternoon to tackle the gigundo burger, and having only been sitting here for 5 minutes with a coffee and a Bobo Oat Bar Apple Pie, a group of cocky dudes in popped-collar polos have stretched their khaki legs out at a neighboring table, discussing who’s going to “finish it.” (In my head it’s “Finish Him!” in the Mortal Kombat voice.) And yes, I had to interrupt their chatter bragging about how I finished it last week and yes, it’s delicious and dry-laugh, yes, I realize that my body weight is about 5% that of the whole burger.

My taste buds are much happier in sweet territory right now than cheesy meat. Opening a Bobo bar is like unwrapping a memory from my grandmother’s kitchen in Fall. Every oaty nibble has a sweet bite of apple and the warm cinnamon punch, although if it was Gammy it wouldn’t be a punch as much as a pillowy hug. I am anxious for Fall’s arrival only so much that I want to wear pj pants without being too hot, open the windows without being too hot, drink an afternoon coffee without being too hot … a theme here is that growing up in Georgia, I’ve watched the season of Fall shrink considerably. We jump right from summer swelter to winter sweaters with very little mild orange-tinged leaves in between. Kroger recently set out their cinnamon brooms and at first smell it annoyed me (I’m not ready for Fall smells and pumpkin-themed novelty foods!) but eating this delicious Bobo Apple Pie makes me yearn for Fall. And there’s the burger being served – it looks just as dauntingly cheese-melty and bacon-laden as it was last week, and no, my intestines are in no way ready to take on that challenge, let along any food item that requires a time limit. But a bar-eating contest? I could get behind that. Man v. Food, I challenge you to a contest of protein bar ingestion. 5/5

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