LaraBar Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough: $1/Kroger

larabar_chocchipcookiedough (3)Back in college at UGA, my friends and I held eye-rollingly bad theme parties pretty frequently, the standard keg-&-red-cup fair, but dressed in pajamas, pimp n’ hoes, toga, 80s, and thrift store formal. One of the many pajama nights (they were the most comfortable – who doesn’t want to play beer Jenga in flannel sleepy pants?), my roommate at the time, Kirk, busted out a bucket, a literal pail w/ a handle, of chocolate chip cookie dough, and as the party wound down, several of us sat at the kitchen table and ingested the entire several pounds’ worth of Sam’s Club cookie dough w/ our hands. Nary a ball hit a pan in the oven. So from then on, anybody w/ a Sam’s Club membership was required to purchase cookie dough, frozen pigs in blankets, Chex Mix, Nature’s Own honey wheat bread, and peppered turkey pastrami. (The last two became a daily side dish to the cliched coed bowl of ramen, but only when prepared in the sandwich maker, and for some reason, that particular style of questionable brand deli meat was only available at Sam’s.)

Lara Bar’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough bar does not in any way, shape, form, taste, or color resemble the bucket that fueled our parties, tingled our sweet-tooths and added several hours’ of groaning to our bleary-eyed mornings. I’m more than halfway through the bar and I’m actually concentrating on chewing sloooowly in the hopes that I can detect anything that reminds me of cookie dough b/c the ingredient list looks like it should be tasty, but unfortunately, it tastes like a squishy “yawn” which is what I did on most of those mornings following a theme party at Sussex Club. If Larabar had existed back then and I was able to swap it out for nights of endless cookie-dough eating, maybe I wouldn’t have gained my freshman-forty. 2/5
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Categories: Lara

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